Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Randomize
