What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
