what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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