There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Randomize
