Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
