i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
How naked do you want me to be?
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