so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I take back everything I said about communal showers
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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