I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
