I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize