oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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