Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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