She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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