that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize