The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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