none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
