Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
