I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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