i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
