she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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