I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
