I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize