North Korea, Best Korea!
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
