Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
