your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Randomize
