ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
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