Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
