he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
