You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
