Me. At least after what I've been through.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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