I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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