it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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