i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
