And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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