Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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