I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
