Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
