Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
