i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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