You're so nebulous sometimes
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
