A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
