i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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