apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
