Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
