Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
