you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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