The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
