It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
