your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
