Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
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