everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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